Had one of these uncles, he also featured a single good eye, the other damaged in a previous fireworks mishap. Didn’t stop him though, and the bad eye could see clear underwater he’d say.
the bad eye could see clear underwater he’d say.
Well that’s fuckin’ fascinating! I want an amphibious uncle.
Uncle Ribbit.
He’s French and we can him Uncle Ribot.
“Uncle” Mike, always coming through with the half sticks and a “you didn’t get this from me”. 🤙
My wife’s uncle brought out some homemade dynamite. I wasn’t getting anywhere near it, but that shit rocked the house from across the field.
1920s moment
I was that uncle one time. We blew a bucket into orbit.
Gandalf riding to the Shire.
Gandalf was rocking a very different look in his younger years.
They save money on the fuse length.
Uncle jumps up onto the deck
You and the other kids get ready for a fire works show
Jake the Snake reaches into his bag and drops a hundred pound python onto your shoulders
The kids roar with excitement as you pass out from the snake wrapped around your neck and chest
Needs to do the DDT first. Then the snake after the 3 count lol
lol … god we used to go wild watching all that when we were kids and mock DDT the youngest kid in our group
My older brother and I would do the moves after watching Sunday afternoon WWF. DDT onto the bed mattress was common practice. Jake was a badass.
I’m Indigenous and we have a big sprawling family of cousins and relatives. When I was about ten, I was part of a small gang of about 20 kids my age and we all played together and loved wrestling and the WWF. A bunch of my cousins built a shitty looking wrestling ring in their backyard with old mattresses and lined it with old boards and dirty old rope with turnbuckles made of old clothing, duct tape and hockey equipment. We played on it for a long while until the literal body count of broken fingers, twisted ankles, bruises, cuts, scrapes, a dislocated shoulder, a few broken bones and a daily train of crying children forced the adults to shut it down.
But before it was closed, we all learned how to do a ‘figure-four leg lock’ … and how to reverse it! … and it was glorious to watch my buddies climb a turnbuckle, stand with arms raised and jump off into the air like Super Fly Jimmy Snuka … of all the dumb pictures I take now with my smartphone, I wish I could have taken tons of photos back then.
Fuck no, not anymore. Firework prices have gone insane.
I can’t remember what the name of the firework the store was selling was, but the one near us had a banner saying that six of them were $300.
And people go in and out of that place all day.
Hey- we weird uncles work hard to get the good stuff. Don’t be hatin’!
The reason is Fun.
My mother was just telling me about “Motorcycle Pete”, an old man who lived in our neighborhood through her childhood and early adulthood who was known for making homemade fireworks for the kids in town.
The city him to stop after 9/11.
And they end up saving you from a werewolf attack.
