My mom had a tuxedo cat named Sammy. I was 17 and a pothead. I came home from McDonalds. I had like 80 chicken nuggets in my bag. And Shrek was on tv as I smoked a bowl. So I thought it was funny to say “HEY!!! HEY DONKEY!!! DONKEY!!! HEY DONKEY!!!”
And my cat was like MEOW? So I said HEY! DONKEY!!! DONKEY!! HEY! HEY DONKEY DONKEY DONKEY!!!"
And she said “MEOW???”
So then years later I was in my 20s with my own tuxedo cat named Karmalee. And Karmalee liked when evil thing happened. So I said to her in a devil voice “HEY KARMALEE!!! I’M GOING TO CONJUR UP THE SPIRITS OF MALEBOLGIA TO SPREAD EVIL AND DARKNESS ACROSS THE LANDS AS WE SPILL THE BLOOD OF THE INNOCENT!!!”
And she went face down, ass up, tail straight up, and did that thing when cats are in heat where their tails wiggle and their meow is more like meheheheheheheow!!!
She did that.
My point is, I too can tell long winded, entertaining, but ultimately pointless stories about cats that go nowhere.
Would you like to hear about Karmalees frenemy Speed?
My mom had a tuxedo cat named Sammy. I was 17 and a pothead. I came home from McDonalds. I had like 80 chicken nuggets in my bag. And Shrek was on tv as I smoked a bowl. So I thought it was funny to say “HEY!!! HEY DONKEY!!! DONKEY!!! HEY DONKEY!!!”
And my cat was like MEOW? So I said HEY! DONKEY!!! DONKEY!! HEY! HEY DONKEY DONKEY DONKEY!!!"
And she said “MEOW???”
So then years later I was in my 20s with my own tuxedo cat named Karmalee. And Karmalee liked when evil thing happened. So I said to her in a devil voice “HEY KARMALEE!!! I’M GOING TO CONJUR UP THE SPIRITS OF MALEBOLGIA TO SPREAD EVIL AND DARKNESS ACROSS THE LANDS AS WE SPILL THE BLOOD OF THE INNOCENT!!!”
And she went face down, ass up, tail straight up, and did that thing when cats are in heat where their tails wiggle and their meow is more like meheheheheheheow!!!
She did that.
My point is, I too can tell long winded, entertaining, but ultimately pointless stories about cats that go nowhere.
Would you like to hear about Karmalees frenemy Speed?