This summer's intense heat has been causing problems for airlines. In some areas it's been so hot, cans of carbonated soda have burst after being loaded onto some Southwest flights.
Takata air bag company threatens to file a trademark infringement suit (this is satirical)
They could just NOT provide canned cancer on the flight! Water will do.
Oh yeah, that water on flights that they give to you in those little plastic bottles? Absolutely 100% cancer-free!
No deeabitus tho