But unemployment is at the lowest ever! We added 200.000 jobs. There was only a soft recession. Line goes up, and just in time for something important. What a coincidence. The economy is so great and we’re back in the bull market!

I had to change my diet to purely swallowing peanuts with water. Then, I slowly reintroduced my typical diet of McDonald’s double cheese burgers, vodka, and energy drinks. Once I had a population of squirrels that could tolerate my pure excrement, things really took off. They started getting larger and mutating. I had to stop before they started raping all the dogs in the neighborhood. I spent nearly 2 months holed up in my attic with a pallet of MREs, 4 dozen handles of vodka, and 15,000 rounds of M855.

THAT MADE MY ASSHOLE MOIST WITH JEALOUSY ARRRROOOOOO

THOSE BURGERS COME WITH FREE TOILET PAPER BROTHER, THAT’S WHY IT’S SO EXPENSIVE. I USE THE BURGER WRAPPER, THEN THE BAG, THEN FINISH UP WITH THE BROWN NAPKIN. KEEP YOU ASSES FRESH, BROTHERS.

bruh

Bruh, mark your cum jug NSFW, we’re not confused. Everyone has a cum jug.

So glad I decided to stop lurking and actually start participating right as the whole fediverse dies out, it’s not just lemmy.

CHUGGA CHUGGA CHOO CHOO BROTHER

I envy his attention span.

On a burner, that I got a homeless guy to buy, in Portugal, which I illegally entered, from Spain, which I also illegally entered.

Finally. I can look at cats and femboys.

Or the office hand sanitizer